Can You Really Meet Your Match on Match.com??

If you have been following along with my journey, you will have heard me talk about The Best Husband in the World (BHITW). Also, if you were reading closely you may have picked up on the fact that I was a 38 year old widow a decade ago and that although my previous relationship had been full of ups and downs it had lasted for 17 long years. For full disclosure I had separated from my husband a few months before his death after many years of trying to save our marriage. After being with the same person for that much time and being focused on raising a child and having a career and doing all the things that go along with that I never came up for air to really ask myself, am I happy? In the fall of 2008, after finishing my Master's Degree the answer was a resounding NO. So finally after years of contemplation I had decided that I couldn't let any more of my life pass by without true joy. I couldn't have known at that time how the dominos would fall in the next few months and that I would have to wade through tragedy before I would even be able to ever think about joy again. But time went by and I again started thinking and dreaming of what the next phase of my life would look like for myself and Sierra. I wanted what I had sadly lacked for many years, I yearned to find my best friend and so I did what any sane somewhat recently separated and then widowed almost 40 year old woman would do and I joined Match.com. Now Match is a special kind of freak show and maybe some of you have been to the circus. My picture reflected my true age and weight and the things that I wrote in my profile were true. Shockingly, some of the people on this website thought it was acceptable to shave about 10 years and at least 10 pounds off in the picture that they posted. Yes, Yes...I know that you are all thinking that beauty is on the inside yada yada yada. This is certainly true, but if there is no chemistry there is no chemistry. Look people, I was moving in fast on 40 and I was looking for some sparks. You can definitely find any type of "spark" that you desire on Match, as many people offered me many types of good times. But as a big proponent of not being chained up in someone's basement I mostly declined. Now don't get me wrong there were A LOT of frogs but there were also some princes. I met a very nice prince but he came along too soon and I was not done grieving and he was not my prince. I think of him often and hope that he found his Match like I found mine. I had taken a few months off of Match to just be with me for awhile and then I decided that I would give it one more chance. That chance would lead me to Matthew the (BHITW). We chatted for quite a while and even spoke on the phone a few times before finally deciding to meet as we were both burned out on dating. (Yes, people already it's tough out there!) So we finally decided to meet at Bonefish Grill for dinner. Now if things are going badly on a Match date, you say things like oh that is the baby sitter texting and let's just split the bill and it was great to meet you although it really wasn't at all. But in this case I met this man and the minute I met him I felt like I had come home and he had just been waiting there all along. He was from Syracuse and I am from Buffalo and so to him my sarcasm was actually funny instead of somewhat offensive. Date number 1 was pure bliss and I would probably have let him lock me in his basement but this is Florida and we don't have them, plus I am just not the first date kind of girl. Who am I kidding I was almost 40 but I had a child at home that wasn't happening. A second date is an amazing sign for Match, so we set it up and met at the Outback for dinner after which his car had been towed away for parking in a no parking zone. No problem, I would simply drive him to some random tow truck lot in Tampa about an hour away to get his car back. Matt had just moved to the area and I am truly directionally impaired. You could literally drop me in my own neighborhood and I may never find my own home again! Needless to say it was a long night, but we finally found and paid the ransom to get his car back. After learning of my mad navigational skills, he still wanted to learn more about me so we set up date number 3. So I got a kid sitter and this time we met at Carrabbas. I had two glasses of wine at the restaurant and then we walked over to a bar named, "The Beer Garten". I ordered another glass of wine and Matt ordered one beer. When he ordered that one beer it happened to be the last beer in the keg and with much ceremony he was given an extremely classy t-shirt that read, "I Killed the Keg". Just to remind you I was currently a single mom, public school teacher, avid reader and not much of a drinker. We make it about half way through our drinks and I start to feel weird like someone had drugged me. So we get up to leave and I make it to the parking lot before I lay on the ground and begin to throw up. I am hoping that we have gotten to know each other well enough by now readers that you may know that I am not a lay on the ground and throw up kind of a girl (well at least since high school!). But there I was two and a half drinks in with the man of my dreams with his trunk open while I am laying on the ground as sick as a dog thinking how nice the cold pavement felt on my face. Of course I was thinking that maybe I had been a poor judge of character and that I would soon be buried by a golf course or actually chained in his closet. But alas readers, he was simply getting paper towels out of his trunk to help me clean myself up. I knew he was a prince but what could he be thinking of this odd princess? Clearly, this light weight couldn't drive myself home so Matt pulled up outside our townhouse and placed me in the chair on our front porch. He did not bring me in as I did not want Sierra to meet anyone until we were truly serious. So sadly, this is how my beautiful ten year old found me on the porch and as an added bonus I was holding the, "I Killed the Keg" t-shirt. Yikes, was I grounded! The good and bad news was that I had not been roofied, I was actually getting the flu and was in bed for the entire next week of my life. I often wonder why my sweet boy kept coming back because life certainly hasn't gotten any less weird. I have also been thinking that I really sold him a bill of goods 8 years ago when I had breasts and hair, maybe you guys were right beauty truly is on the inside and yes you can meet your match on Match...to be continued!


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